How To Save A LifeThe Fray
by lovedrreid
Summary: A songfic inspired by title . Reid is having trouble with some things and Morgan seems to make it worse to Reid.


How to save a life: The Fray

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A/N: Okay, here we go. Mostly fiction. No Spoilers. No Slash. No Pairings. No Romance. Just Friendship. This is my first shot to try to make you cry. This has a message and I will tell you what it is at the end of the story. Think about what the message could be.

Prologue:

Looks from everyone surround you. You don't care though. As you sit down, the stares are as much there as when you first arrived. The team looks at your arms and wonder why, but you still don't care what they think. It's your own way. The scars are different shades of purple showing how long they've let you off the hook. How could they do that to you? How could they not care about you?

_'Step one you say we need to talk_

_He walks you say sit down, it's just a talk_

_He smiles politely back at you_

_You stare politely right on through'_

Morgan was the first to approach you. You roll your eyes when you see the worry in his eyes. You still don't care. Why couldn't they care sooner before you did that to yourself. He wants you to talk to him. To let him in. You try to walk away, but he grips your shoulders and tells you to sit down in private. The stares look away in sadness and stress.

You dare not look him in the eye, fear he'll see right through your smile. There is nothing to smile about. He tries to fake you a smile, too, but is covered by guilt and sadness. He can see right through your lies written on your face as if a writer would while writing fiction. It is not true. You are lying.

_'Some sorta window to your right_

_As he goes left and you stay right_

_Between the lines of fear and blame_

_You begin to wonder why you came'_

He knows what you're doing. He knows that you're hiding yourself. Shielding yourself. He tells you to face your actions and put an end to what you've been doing to forget.

You refuse to go back and the sadness in his eyes grow to demand and it scares you. You lean toward your own choices. He keeps saying it's not good to do to yourself, but you don't listen. You don't believe him. You believe he doesn't understand. You go the opposite way.

_'Let him know you know best_

_Cause after all you do know best_

_Try to slip past his defense _

_Without granting innocence'_

He says he knows best, but he doesn't understand. He will never understand you. He means best, but nothing more. You still aren't convinced of his ways. You stare at him easily to show you don't care anymore, because you don't. If you did, you would be listening to him, not the voice in your head telling you to forget it.

He tries to reason with you, but it doesn't work. You will not give in to him. He doesn't grant any innocence, because you aren't. You're guilty, and you know it, but you don't care. You've never cared. Ever since the team abandoned you. Just like your father. Abandonment makes you angry as these thoughts posses your mind and you get angry with Morgan for telling you how to live and end your life.

'_Lay down a list of what is wrong_

_The things you've told him all along_

_And pray to God he hears you_

_And pray to God he hears you'_

He tells you you're falling apart. He tells you you're not okay. That you have problems that you can work out together, but you don't want to. It's your own problems and you'll deal with them as you please.

He tells you you're depressed, suffering from PTSD, have a drug problem, and biggest, fears of things you can talk about. You are tired of life and want to go home to fulfill your plan to gracefully end your life, but he's holding you from doing that.

_'As he begins to raise his voice_

_You lower yours and grant him one last choice_

_Drive until you lose the road_

_Or break the ones you've followed'_

You begin to get angrier by the second. You raise your voice and he gets fed up with it. He gives you one last chance to make a choice. He says to you, you can keep going down this road and drive off the cliff when the end comes, or you can stop now and follow a better, less rough road. You don't listen. You simply drown him out along with his conscience. He doesn't get angry when you don't answer. He simply pushes you harder, so you further yourself away from reality.

You try your hardest to not give in. He starts making sense to you, but you don't want to comprehend it. All you want is that razor that is sitting simply on your bathroom counter. That's all you ask for. A sharp, silver piece of metal that can make your world seem bearable.

_'He will do one of two things_

_He'll admit to everything_

_Or he'll say he's just not the same_

_And you'll begin to wonder why you came'_

He tells you to just admit it that you have problems; that you need help. He convinces you that you can get help, you know it, but you don't want it, so why should you have to get it? If you don't want something, don't get it. Same goes for help. You need help, you don't want it, why would you get it? This was your defense. He still doesn't get it, but he doesn't have to. Only you have to get yourself. You don't care if anyone else wonders why.

You swallow your pride and say your last goodbye. He tries to stop you, but you keep going. You just lost your friends, family, job, everything. You still don't care because you have nothing to go back to, so it didn't matter. Nothing mattered to you at the point. You go home. Once you're inside, you lock the door and go straight to the bathroom to get your razor. The small sting isn't enough for you anymore.

You firmly press the sharp edge to you wrist. With one quick slash, blood is pouring out a deep, clean cut. You continue with that arm until you lose the fight. You fall into unconscious. Soon after you feel the escape of it, you welcome the darkness and say one last goodbye to the once horrible life. You say hello to the bright light that is before you. You now know who God is.

'_Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend_

_Somewhere along in the bitterness_

_And I would have stayed up with you all night_

_Had I known how to save a life'_

You don't hear anything. Even as the door is being kicked open, you find yourself following God to the golden gates. He sees you and yells and cries as he calls an ambulance. He holds your arms to stop the blood. You nearly fall, but yet again, he's holding you up. You fight him to let go. He doesn't. He forgets all that you said and pulls you up enough for you to mumble something incoherent. Maybe it was just an attempt to verbally fight him. He didn't care, though. He kept hanging on to you. Soon, you're being lifted onto a gurney and wheeled away to the ambulance. You try to say no, but you're too busy using the energy to leave the cruel world.

You, almost too soon, open your eyes to a bright white room. Your family is there, including Morgan. You see their sad faces and notice you've matched theirs. It _was_ your fault for all the stress of the team. You realize now they feel the same way, and doing what you're doing is only making it worse for them. You love them and wouldn't hurt them. But you're a whole. If you hurt yourself, you'll hurt them, so it is your duty to get better for your team. To heal yourself, you're healing the team.

The team leaves you and Morgan to talk. You begin at the start of the earlier conversation, but you are not letting him in and opening up. He smiles and promises you help whenever you'll need it. You do care now.

"I do admit to everything..." You admit. He smiles at you for it.

"I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life. I do now." He says to you. Now you believe him and will always now. He's proven himself to know what's best.

'_Life is like a beautiful melody, only the lyrics are messed up.' ~ Hans Christian Andersen_

**A/N: So, how did you like it? I will not make a follow up right now as I've accidentally started four multi-chapter stories, but I may try if I find the time to do so. Please tell me if it's worth trying to continue this.**


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